26 February Journal

Good morning folks, Its a cool (cold) start to our day here. After a week of unseasonable warm temps its cold again. Tomorrow is to be bringing rain once again.

So i got up early as usual yesterday morning. I went and got a mani/pedi and stopped at the beauty supply, and we did our taxes. I got a rather “bold” choice of yellow color on both my toe and fingernails. It was needing a change to something sunshiny. It really doesnt match a thing  in my wardrobe but I really dont care. Maybe it will be a new fad, LOL. But what do I care if I match in that manner. Thats the issues with getting your nails done. You dont just spend the money and not just own it. 

Spekain gof just owning it, I own my self once again for what ever that means. A day away from the work phone, computer and the issues I need to deal with has really helped. I am still a tad stressed out. So wth that I know I have really got to spend some time today to clean and ready my bicycle. I think I may keep it in the house for ease of access in the 3am hours to just go get a ride in for the day to clear the brain and help me cope the day over. If I dont start getting some excercise I am going to blow up like a balloon. I sit 75% or more of my day and weekends lately. I do need some cardio action and some yoga. I need to work my body out as the brain is done in the evening and the body isnt. That has left me not sleeping correctly lately. Like yesterday for instance. I was tired and ready for bed at 830PM,  Lucky I spent a couple hours at the mall walking around. I tried to keep things out of my mind. But that wasnt working to well as I have spent about 2 hours doing some work. My mind just hasnt got the focus for it. I was focused but it can be disturbed rather quickly here lately. 

WE have to go grocery shopping here shortly. I Really need to go get ready but it is sunday after all. So that leaves me in a mode of I do not care. I just wanna be able to have some fun of my own. Some time to get away and be free is what I guess is the right word. Yet When you watch the news and see different things here and there it can leave one rather down. It doesnt matter about age, gender, sexuality or anthing else. I just need to figure out what I need to do about my own future. Feeling stuck in a rut, not making any ground in anything, work or personal. It isnt a good thing to sit where i am at the moment, but, I am trying to stay positive in hopes of a much needed change to the better. Not only for me, but for Mistress also. Our Jobs stink, memphis sucks and we are rather stuck here.

Well Folks, I am gonna end here as a way to stop thinking about where I been and what Ive got going wrong. I need to look ahead and find the light of success in. Kinda like that tacky looking mustard yellow fingernail polish, though with some hunter green will be close enough to green bay colors I coul duse it next foot ball season. With a lighter green could be a cute froggy bag thing I recieved recently. I have yet to use it as it is a bit on the too young side for me to carry around I would be thinking. But, I could just own it and carry this cute thing. 

So for now, it hangs over watching the loveliness of my life. A loveliness that Mistress and I both tend to forget we have. Thats a rather sad way to be ya know. What a crazy life we all lead, thte ups and downs, seemingly the downs at times rule our lives. How do we over come those? We all have our ways, and for me its to complete the issues that caused it and move on. But, Thats about all i can do for now, attempt.

Well folks I need to go, get ready and see if today can be as cool as yesterday was. Disconnect from the world and mostly work. Have a great day!!

Love Candi

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