I have no clue whats wrong with me today. Or all week to be honest. I did start feeling pretty good for a day or two and now i am back into the bllues. I wonder if its the hormones? The lack of actual rest? Lack of sleep? Or all three? Or is it just the winter blues? Either way I need to do something. And now tht the radiator is back in my motor bike, mabe i can go free up my mind a bit. Its cheap to put fuel in the bike and go for a ride for a couple hours. It really does clear ones mind.
So now i am done eating the wonderful meat loaf that I made. Side of spinach and Ranch beans. 3 glasses of my own wine concoction. Moscato and ginger ale is really good. So I am getting a bit tipsy on top of the tired I already have. I had on last nights make up all day, didnt go anyplace. I did manage a bath of sea salt and hot water to soak in and got my hair cleaned of the hair spray from last night as well. Now I am felling the need for sleep comoing strong. Yeah I cannot type well as i am fairly tipsy. I also fell asleep on the couch earlier today. I would had stayed asleep for awhile but the winter itchies kept creeping up on me. So mybe its all because I am tired.
Maybe these blues will disappear soon. I sure hope so, because I want to get rid of them and be a cheerful Amazon again. I know i am a cheerful Amazon, because I rememeber it. i Just gotta get back to it. Maybe tomorrow. I have got to stop feelin gsorry for myself.
I just feel that sometimes I keep having to appologize for being me. I know I shouldnt but still feel many issues are my fault. even when they arent I feel that way and try and try to keep myself from believing that things arent my fault yet I canno tkeep myself from feeling it. I have always felt that way and always treid to get rid of it. I did for a while and now its back with a vengence.Abyway I am off to bed real soon. as I need to get that needed rest. Besides My words are becoming rather wierd as i am not hittin the right keys.