28 September journal

Good morning folks it’s humpday. It’s been a rather long week. Stressful at work, stressing in my head. Hope you all are doing well. The temps have cooled off rather nice now. As fall gas come it’s in the fifties and feels rather cold as we went from mid to upper 70s to that. Sitting outside in the evenings is nice now. 

Now that I’m at work, I see that some parts have arrived to get installed. I need to get busy on that today. I have a unit that needs to get finished up. So I’ll have plenty of time to think. And feel like I’ve accomlished something. 

Last evening before my 7pm bed time, i watched the last three episodes of Transparent. It kinda got me down, like I really needed any help in that department right now. Mistress was out doing some stuff with a co-worker, i was alone in need of a shoulder. There wasn’t one only me. I will say it brought to my forefront something that i had thought about. I hadn’t put a lot of stock into thinking any deeper about this until last night. My transition means that everyone has to transition. They have to mourn loss, accept the new person, even if i feel it’s not different to me. Also I cannot expect anyone to just accept this immediately. If one were to think about it, it took must of us some time to decide and act on our transition. Yes, we knew what we should do. But the societal norms of the day were much different than it is now. Not that anyone is to blame. That’s just how it was then. So here we are, transitioning, having our internal fight or whatever, and yet we expect others to fully accept us on whim. They have to have time to process this and understand it or they will leave you be forever. Not that i want that. So, i personally am leaving the issue in my parents court of play. When they toss the ball back and are ready we will talk some more. That’s really all i or anyone else can do. So I need to stop dwelling on this. I need to be me again and quits stressing. Things will be right of do that. I’m good at advise, i suck at taking it. Even my own advise i suck at taking. But let’s get off that and I’m moving on. 

Mistress got up with me this morning. That’s not like her. I hope she is OK. I’m thinking we have to have a heart to heart. But I’m not forcing it. I just hope she is OK. 

Well, is time to get cracking, like an egg, things gotta get done. have a great day everyone. 


Love Candi

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