19 August journal

Hello Americans, it’s Friday. So I think it is. I’ve been up since 0315 hurting in just about everyplace that can hurt, including my boobs. Boob’s hurting is a good thing, it means they are growing. Yippie!

The fact that life is passing me by while I  work is getting old. We had, or we tried to havea discussion about what to do in the future, both immediate and long term. I was just too tired. And we really got no place in that discussion. 

Transitioning, is getting difficult. Not for the fact of doing it. Im stuck in the in-between state i feel. The femininity comes out and I’m thinking I’ll getw questioned. Which is fine, but at work, I’m still looking rather male. Yet, feeling female. But the feeling femalehas been a lifetime problem. Finally things are getting there. I know to, that the hrt is doing its job in more ways than one. I just don’t have the stamina to work 12+ hours a day everyday like i did before. And no rest is making me one very cranky bitch. But for the most part I’m happy in my transition. I thinki just need to get away from the stress of the current job. It’s really old. But I feel stuck until name and gendermarker changes happen. 

I’ve been looking at work boots on line. My issue is that men’s I’m an 11 women’s I’m a twelve. No problem right, buy a men’s boot. Not, I wear and have such a narrow foot i can’t wear them. So my issue is good work boots are to short in women’s, and to wide in men’s. Maybe I can have half my toes surgically removed so I can fit into women’s shoes easier. Lol.

Well folks it’s time to  be hot and sexy oops, hot and heavy working. But I’ve done that already as well. It’s almost 7am. Have a great day!


Love Candi

8 Comments Add yours

  1. Selina says:

    I can’t say I know how you feel but I am imagining how hard transitioning can be. I once worked with someone who had completed transitioning in the 1980’s and was living as a woman in the 1990’s. Even though she had been a woman for YEAR she still struggled at times with how people in the work force saw her. However, she was the most classy and well rounded person I had ever meet and I was always proud to call her my friend.

    My point to saying this is…while it is hard, it is more accepting how and while it is hard both at home and work, I have faith that God won’t give you more than you can bear.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. candicejune says:

      I expect that. Though I feel in stuck in getting that far right now. I’ll make it though. Thanks for the pick me up. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I was surprised the first time I had to do some heavy labor (repairing wind-blown fencing) after starting HRT. Then I remembered the testosterone blocker. It really effects you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. candicejune says:

      I heard it would. I wasn’t having much issues. Most because I’ve always tried to be smart in my work. But I’ve noticed even the simplest things are taxing now. I’ll sure it will get worse before I get used to it.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. My main problem is endurance. I ain’t got none! Just a little stress and my battery is dead. I just have to sit down and catch my breath for a while. I used to work all day. I had a small horse ranch where I worked every day AFTER my real job. No problem. Not now… I’d die!


    2. candicejune says:

      I can still out work the 22 year old that works with me lol

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Trust me, a 22-year old has no concept of actual work.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. candicejune says:

      I know that. However he should be stronger than me. And I’m still showing him up. Lol. I tease him about a girl showing him up. Hahaha

      Liked by 1 person

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